“You will find that it is necessary to let things go;

simply for the reason that they are heavy.”

― C. JoyBell C.

Stuff I wouldn’t mind leaving at the baggage claim area forever is this darkness that I have within me. It is something that comes and goes in droves. I think about all things that were promised to me and I have yet to get. I think of all the dreams that are deferred. The dreams that have been cast aside… and I mourn the dreams that are dead.

It is hard to feel when you feel dead inside and your movements are on auto pilot and no one notices. The one that promises to love you forever does not see the hurt or depression or the automation, but your online friends hear in your voice or see it in your eyes when your doing a video. What does that say about him? Or about them?

When you wake up solely because you have kids and they are the only reason you live and breath. You pray and pray and all that you are hearing is “not yet”… and you keep asking “ok when?” The stress is giving your migraines and stomachs aches.

Living with the pain has become the norm for me. Late nights, little to no sleep, praying and waiting for the come up and the follow through…Until then