I am yearning

“I’m restless. Things are calling me away.
My hair is being pulled by the stars again.”

— Anaïs Nin

To be more than I am right now. I want to show my three children that there is more to life than a 9-5 career – don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with working in a office,but there I know there is more! There has to be! I am yearning to know what the Lord’s bigger picture of my life really and truly is.. I have asked and prayed he has not yet revealed it me.

He gave me both my online boutiques (Chloe+Isabel and Younique) and He is slowly making provision for both. I know that he does not give you a vision without provision. I run both of my businesses ALONE since my other half wants nothing do with it. Once my husband retired from the military we agreed that we would live in Texas where I knew I would get a job with no problem,but at the last minute he changed the game plan and moved us to the swamp and it is been ALL DOWN HILL ever since!

At one time I thought I had forgiven him, but I guess I have not done so fully as of yet. During one fight I told him about this and even turned my feelings around to make himself look like hero and make me look bad! Which is something he does frequently in a arguement. As much I love him and know that he is trying to change his ways this is one thing is hard for me get pass. I don’t know what that is. If you readers have opinion please let me know.

It’s sad I see so many of my Y sisters and Candi sisters hubbys and boyfriends out helping them with businesses, supporting them, doing parties for them, etc. What is mine doing? Absolutely nothing when we live in a tiny town where he knows absolutely everybody! How do you think that makes me feel? To have no family support? Except my mother and my friends…